The things that parents did but would never admit

2016-12-22 「 2240 words / 4 minute 」
The things that parents did but would never admit.jpg
magazine
大多数时候,我们都是称职的父母,竭尽全力的抚养淘气鬼。但是,养孩子实在是太难了。说实话,有时候我们会做些事情以顺利度过一整天。不管是上述哪种情况,我们都已尽力了,对不?以下就是父母做了但却永远不会承认的事儿。
Most of the time, we are all stellar parents doing everything we can to raise our little rascals in the best way possible. But dayyyuuummm, parenting is hard. And let's be honest, sometimes we do things just to make it through the day. Whatever the case, we are all trying our best, right? Here are things parents have done but will never, ever admit.
1. 宝宝半夜大哭时,自己假装睡得很沉,这样另一半就不得不起来哄小宝宝。
1. Pretended to be deep in slumber so that the other parent had to get up and answer the toddler's middle-of-the-night cries
2. 因为你没有精力让孩子准时到校,所以你就让他/她待在家里不去上学。
2. Let your kid stay home from school because you just didn't have the energy to get her ready and there on time
3. 你会翻遍孩子们万圣节要来的糖果,然后把最好的留下。
3. Gone through the kids' Halloween candy and kept the best picks
4. 当你在商场里看到别的小孩子对妈妈大发脾气时,会突然觉得自己是个好母亲/父亲。
4. Felt better about yourself when you saw that mom at the mall whose kid was throwing a level 10 tantrum
5. 当初因为小孩做了一些事情而对他/她大吼,但却猛然间发现自己也在做这些事情。
5. Caught yourself doing the exact same thing you recently yelled at your kid for doing
6. 在照片分享网站上做了难吃的西兰花油炸土豆丸子。
6. Made those awful broccoli tater tots on Pinterest
7. 哄孩子吃饭的时候失去了理智。
7. Lost your shit when trying to get your kids to eat
8. 你并不喜欢孩子们为你端来的自制早餐。
8. Hated every bite of breakfast in bed prepared by your kids
9. 醒来的时候发现自己的孩子就在床边盯着你看的时候,会立马跳起来进入战斗模式。
9. Jumped to your feet in combat mode when you wake to find your child standing next to your bed ... staring at you
10. 会让你的孩子穿特定的衣服,避免被别人说三道四。
10. Dressed your kid a certain way just to avoid being judged by others
11. 给孩子喝过期牛奶。
11. Given your kid the expired milk
12. 试图扮鬼脸吓唬孩子。
12. Tried to scare your kid with your face
13. 因为牙仙子没有出现,而编一些蹩脚的借口。
13. Made up some lame excuse for the tooth fairy not coming
14. 有时候会觉得自己养了个连环杀手。
14. Thought that maybe you were raising a serial killer
15. 别人问你上一次洗澡是什么时候时,你撒了谎。
15. Lied about when you last showered
16. 在孩子的睡觉时间上撒了谎。
16. Lied about what time you put your kids to sleep
17. 让孩子为你做事。
17. Made them work for you
18. 做了有关卡由(儿童动画)的噩梦。
18. Had a nightmare about Caillou
19. 试着从熟睡婴儿的脖子下抽出自己的手臂时,受到了惊吓。
19. Had a panic attack trying to move your arm from underneath a sleeping baby